You are being prepared for an extraordinary destiny
Hardship is part of the preparation.
Self-talk is a powerful thing. Whether you are talking to yourself in the moments before an exam or just trying to get through your day, it's important for self-talking to be positive and include strong words of encouragement that can boost your confidence levels when you need them most.
You probably have done it before. A minute prior to receiving the test papers, you found yourself saying, "You studied the material, so don't worry─ You got this!" through a silent voice in your head.
That quoted message is an example of positive self-talk, where you tell an optimistic note to yourself. It could send good vibes to your inner soul. It can boost your confidence in passing the test. It's what your mom tells you to do so because nothing is better than inviting good luck by saying good words toward yourself.
But not everyone has the strength to do positive self-talk. Let me tell you why:
Maybe Jake had to attend to a family responsibility taking a big chunk of his study time
Maybe Anna got sick and is not sure if the readings she did are enough
Perhaps Mark is under a stressful life situation clouding up his ability to understand the material
There could be many reasons...
They could end up saying, "I'll probably fail this semester," or "Why am I staying here? I'm not fit to become a doctor," or "I'm not smart enough," and so on…
But you know what? I'm not here to judge you or tell you it's wrong.
I'm not going to push you to change your mindset by just switching off that negative self-talk button. Because I know it's not as easy as deleting a file on your laptop.
What I'll do today is share things you may consider when you keep doubting yourself.
Take it one step at a time
Just like when you're reaching a goal, you lay down the steps on how to get to the state you want to be.
Have you tried writing down your thoughts? You can start with this when it feels hard to share over a conversation. You might find that your thoughts are more accessible when written down.
You can keep a journal or diary of what is happening at the moment. Acknowledge your emotions and release anything negative that might come up, so nothing holds power over how you feel at any given time.
Now, filter the positive aspects of the situation you're in. This step can be very hard. Looking at the bright side when it's completely dark is challenging but doable.
Take a pause when it’s too much
Allow me to tell you a personal story which happened in 2014:
Losing a beloved grandmother while preparing for the Philippine physician licensure exam is something I experienced back then. That memory is still vivid until now. It was one of the lowest points of my life.
It was so hard to focus. I had to skip scheduled review sessions at the Topnotch review center.
I spent days ignoring the upcoming board exam.
You'll see me sitting on the rocking chair where my grandma used to hang out.
You'll find me smiling at the old pictures hanging on my grandparent's room walls.
Fortunately, reminiscing the good memories lightens the heavy feeling when you're in grief.
I looked back at the obstacles I surpassed and all the things I had to give up to reach that point. I was able to stand strong because I started counting the blessings. I made myself appreciate how many people are sending their support and love.
I realized that it's totally fine to take a pause. It's part of the process; I don’t think anyone can function adequately without going through the path.
You may even want to jump out of that phase as quickly as possible, but believe me, you must give yourself that much-needed time.
Treat yourself with kindness
When you study early morning every day and one day you hit the snooze button, suddenly you feel like you are a lazy person. Know this: You are NOT lazy!
Your life is not categorized as perfect or failure. You are a human, and every one of us makes a mistake even when we try our hardest! If you don't get to do something perfectly, tell yourself that it's okay.
Often, we tell ourselves negative things without realizing it. And despite the negative on negative self-talk, it can be helpful in performance improvement, surprisingly.
According to this paper, negative self-talk is considered the negative stimuli that cause an increase in attention to a subsequent stimulus. But doing it for a long time isn't advisable as it has harmful effects.
In this instance, being mindful would help you note what exactly you are saying to yourself. Evaluate what you are thinking and give yourself a reason to smile during tough times.
Practice being mindful
As Mindful.org has emphasized, when we practice mindfulness, we're practicing the art of creating space for ourselves – space to think, space to breathe, space between ourselves and our reactions.
You'll find mindfulness practice useful when negative thoughts keep circling, and your stress level is so high that you can't think clearly.
A video from Harvard that talks about Mindfulness Research
They say it's like an exercise for your brain. So I think it’s like yoga to your body. You become less stressed and more aware of your present self – not yesterday's and not tomorrow's.
Take action: Whether you're a believer or not, give mindfulness meditation a try!
Sounds like a cliché, but really, believe in yourself
This journey won’t be easy, but it will be worth it. Every challenging or delightful experience you come across happens for a reason. So keep going, keep growing, and most importantly, believe in yourself.
Got a story to tell?
If you have a passion for writing, you can send a pitch to my email: contentwriting [at] karenalinas [dot] com with the subject “Pitching for Road to White Coat”
A pitch should include the following:
· What is the story about?
· What will medical students learn from your story? What are the takeaways?
I will surely respond within 7 days!
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